Types of Roommates

1 Aug

Searching for a roommate can be as good as searching for a bride. 

You want someone to whom you can connect and feel comfortable sharing your apartment and personal things. It’s a relationship that may or may not last longer than two years. And you may gradually end up getting divorced because of fight with roommate or if he/she graduates, finds internship, etc. and then the search begins from step one. You can think of roommate as contractual marriage.

Some of these relationships can be memorable, whereas others can be horrifying.

Types of roommates:

 1. You end up with a roommate who always wants to reduce rent and ends up adding more and more people to your unit. (Rent 800/10 = $80 pm per head) He/She just understands the language of money and savings. And, you better not object his/her decision because he/she is the lease holder and any confrontation can lead to you being homeless overnight.

2. Your roommate labels  all the products in a refrigerator with his/her name and you better not drink milk from his /her gallon or borrow an onion, if you want to live peacefully. Over the period of time, his/her label on products becomes the brand name of the products itself. Example: Hritik milk, Hritik Ketchup, Hritik Onion, Hritik Lemon, etc.

3. On the other hand there will be roommates who won’t miss an opportunity to steal your food items in your absence and then have courage to deny, even when it’s too obvious. Guy’s if you are hungry, just ask. Think about people who come home after class or work, assuming that food is left in refrigerator, only to find that there’s ghost in their apartment who eats food in their absence.

4. A roommate who has just entered USA and has been around for few months will try to FAKE American Accent, which definitely sounds stupid and funny to us but he thinks that he has got mastery over the language and will leave no stones unturned to impress you.

5. There are few who will hug you, kiss you and project as if you are their life and they will do anything for you. Brother from another mother types, but ditch you when you need them.

6. He/she threatens to call police or housing for every minor issue that can be settled peacefully by talks.

7. A roommate for whom life is all about partying, drinking, smoking and sex. He is one of those creatures who won’t give a damn about his career, forget about yours. He is also one of those who will puke once a week and ends up urinating in wash basin.

8. A roommate who is always short of cash and never pays rent on time. Begs, borrows,scams and arranges somehow but still money is never sufficient. But, ask him for booze and suddenly you will see $500 balance in his wellsfargo account.

9. You might come across a roommate who will give you paid rides to Walmart even though he/she is going to share groceries. And at times, overcharge you by few cents on every product.

10. A roommate who believes in rounding off all numbers. He owes you $102.79 but will transfer only $100 or $102. I assume his fingers will hurt if he/she will type few extra digits “.79”

11. I NEED TIME: A character who takes 15 minutes to pee and 30 minutes to attend natures call, bathing is never less than an hour. UTILITY at UTA is FREE – Yayyy !!! Dude, others also stay in this apartment who needs to use restroom.

12. A roommate who doesn’t know how to use restroom. Goes for bath and there’s swimming pool ready for you when he/she comes out or if he urinates, you will have“urinary abstract art” allover the pot, no matter how many times you explain him how to use English toilets.If he/she uses wash basin, you will find water scattered all around – including walls. Were you dancing while washing your hands?

13.  A roommate who will borrow your car and have party at your expense. He will use 3 gallons on fuel but refuel just 1-2 gallon. He is one of those kind, who will drive your car all the way to Dallas just to have dosa worth $9. So cost is $8 for fuel and $9 for dosa = $17 total cost for dosa. He won’t be courteous enough to even give you a call and ask if you want something to eat. In short, you end up sponsoring him for his need.

14. You might come across someone who claims to be super rich and intelligent but he’ll be the sickest person on this planet with his brains smaller than rodents.

15. You end up leasing your apartment to your friend who is so called “homeless” and you trust his word that he will make rent payments on time and will find you another person, if he/she decides to move out. What happens next is that you are screwed; you are idiot to trust someone blindly because he/she decides to disappear as lease isn’t on his/her name. Reason: “I got an internship and anyways, I didn’t stay”.

Yes brother, you didn’t stay for two months but wasn’t it your responsibility to make payment as it was leased for definite period? Not having name on lease doesn’t free you from liability..Where are your morals?

16. A day before the exams this person will be working hard strategizing on how to copyrather work hard and study for exam. He will call up all the sources and seniors asking for past exams.

17. A roommate who is never at home or class. His or her daily schedule is- motel to gas station to sleep and same cycle again. Did you come here to study or work in motel? No wonder you are on PROBATION!!!

18. A roommate who thinks himself as a stud – he’s the best in world, girls will die for him and he assumes that he has power to do anything in the world. In reality he lacks self-esteem and you can see that…

19. You might come across a roommate who will give your free advice no matter what, ranging from education to relationship to finance to sex to conflicts, but he won’t make any sense.

20. You may end up with someone who keeps bitching and gossiping about every damn thing in this world. Gossiping gives him kind of high. Good for him/her, it’s better than drugs and you don’t get arrested for gossiping!!!

21. Your roommate can be one of those who has zero discipline and negative organization skills. You will find his socks in hall way, underwear hanging somewhere in apartment, books scattered around, someone who will always keep losing apartment keys, and blame neighbors for cockroaches and bedbugs in your apartment.

22. Be on lookout for strip club maniac in your room.

23. A roommate who won’t contribute a dollar for “netflix” or other physical assets in your apartment like microwave,iron, iron board, TV, DVD Player, PS3, etc. but he wants to use them all as if he owns them. If he/she ends up damaging your property, he/she won’t have courtesy to tell you that they were responsible. And, you don’t have all the time on this earth to play role of “ACP Pradyuman” from C.I.D to find out who damaged your property.

24. Outnumbered: You might end up with roommates who will outnumber you and screw your life. Example: (No offense to any community) If you are from North and stay with three guys from South, they won’t  have courtesy to talk in a language that is understood by all. And if you end up in verbal argument, they might kick you out or file false report against you. You will have no defenses because of this groupism. Few people fight back against injustice, most don’t. 

25. Someone who will wash his/her clothes once a month and bath 2-3 times a week just because he/she didn’t sweat and don’t think that it’s really required to bath. Yes, we need to save water!!!

26. You may come across a character who borrows a book from you for a day and same night at 2am you catch him/her in Central Library scanning you book, for which you paid $150 on amazon and he got free scanned copy, which soon entire class will have. Now, that’s open violation of copyright!!

27. Only 4 people stay in unit but he/she will always cook for 6 people. Guess who are the other two? Thrash Can and neighbor

28. This guy doesn’t believe in washing utensils. You will find same the spoon laying around in wash basin till the day of his graduation. And roommates too don’t bother because it’s not their spoon. Guy’s take ownership and get it cleaned.

29. A roommate who is eagerly waiting on FEDEX package delivery (snacks, sweets, home-made food) that your parents will send. And even before you can grab a bite, he’ll be done with emptying some of your yummy home-made food. A time will come when you will start hiding some of your food in your locker, closet, under your bed, etc. to make sure that your roommate doesn’t get hold of any.

30. A roommate who ends up emptying shampoo or body wash bottle for which he didn’t even contribute a dime. 


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